Male libido and French connection

 The Times of India had reported from Bangalore a few years ago that the Indian wife of a French diplomat had filed a case against him with the police for abusing her daughter. The lady had explained that she was heavily pregnant and when her daughter of less than two years had complained to her that 'Daddy hurts' she had ignored the child. Later her maid reported that 'Sir' used to take his daughter and lock the door for long periods. Then she became aware, scared and started noticing. Her husband took cover under diplomatic immunity and fled the country as soon as he got wind of the police complaint.

Feminist groups have always maintained that women are not always safe at home. There was a big jump in cases of domestic abuse during the recent two Covid lockdowns in India. The right glorifies home and hearth for women but reality is otherwise.

Two days ago I was watching a French movie on TV Monde Asie channel on TV. It is a free channel and I like French movies and their whole approach. The movie was already on when I started watching it. A young woman is admitted to a mental hospital and is not allowed to visit her two young daughters. Her charge that her husband is abusing them is not accepted even when she had managed to get a video of one such act. Her parents in law decide to look after their granddaughters. One day, when accidentally the grandfather goes to the bathroom when the elder granddaughter is in the bath, she cries out. The grandfather immediately understands although the grandmother keeps denying and pressurizes him to consider the consequences. The grandfather was aware of his son's tendencies in the past and had always known but thought that the son was now reformed. He is disturbed and he calls the daughter in law.

Again I do not now what happened in the end but probably the outcome was positive. What has stayed with me is the aggression and duplicity of the son. Others must also be like him.

The more I think of what children, especially girls, go through in life, I shudder.

The French movies are bold. They portray life in all its aspects, warts and all. With us, when Ghashiram Kotwal was to be staged in the then east Germany, a dominant opposing voice was that blemishes in our history should not be advertised. But then how will progress be possible?

Reading list

I recently read an article by a 70-year old lady in The Reader's Digest, Asia (October 1, 2022) Her circumstances of birth and later, marriage, prevented her from pursuing higher education but she had an innate strong desire for learning and for bettering herself. She describes the day in school when her teacher distributed copies of a long reading list of 150 books. The teacher knew that most of her students would not be in a position to go to a university. She wanted them to continue their learning and so painstakingly, over a long period of time, she had compiled the list.

The writer of the article took up the list whenever she could and get - from local libraries, old bookshops and later outright purchase - the books in it. She began at the beginning and is nearly through the list now. After her domestic responsibilities were reduced and after she retired, she could finish 3 or 4 books from the list in a year. She also read them thoroughly, even when she could not understand them fully. For example, she described Das Kapital by Karl Marx as a very boring, rambling book.

The writer is proud of her own work. It was her higher learning, she says. The reading allowed her to get into different situations, perspectives, aspects of life, reasoning, laying bare of emotions etc. etc. and to enrich her understanding and her personality. She is grateful to her teacher and is even more proud of her.

The article got me thinking. I am also a teacher and hundreds of students have passed through my hands. Well, not exactly because there was always a huge gap between students and teachers in a college. Still, I can think of so many who would profit today from a dip into literature. Most of them would be settled in their careers and would have time on hand. At least some would have begun to grapple with thorny issues of meaning of life, our place in the world, purpose of existence, what to do after job, family and money etc. etc. Perhaps my small reading list would help some of them.

I have made a small list of 25 books, 15 fiction, 10 non-fiction. All of them were with me at different periods in my life and I vouch for them. They are an eclectic mix.

I am refining the list right now and soon, I will put it up.